Surviving Christmas

Is your head spinning? Or maybe just hurting at the speed with which we went from celebrating the life-giving reign of Christ last Sunday, to giving thanks on Thursday, to the blatant, in your face celebration of consumerism of “Black Friday” – which in the spirit of holiday creep began several days before Friday.

TV, radio, newspapers, e-mail inbox- all have been full of promotions and ads. The inducements to spend, to get a deal and to acquire the things needed for a perfect holiday.

It takes constant vigilance to avoid the “happiness is just one purchase away” syndrome. Especially when this year a major retailer has a frequently run commercial showing boxes of  ”Joy” and “Love”  being delivered out of a semi trailer. Yep, let’s all go and buy a nice big box of joy.  

On the other hand, it’s not uncommon to find people bemoaning the consumerism of the “holidays”  and advocating a return to the real meaning of Christmas.

Our longing for the iconic Christmas of long ago can turn into the burden of a perfectly decorated house with lovely handcrafted ornaments on the tree. The aroma of homemade cookies, fudge and Christmas dinner delights your houseful of family and friends. 

Then there are those of us who set our sights on a deeply spiritual Christmas.  Special  devotional time. Meaningful prayer. Extra worship services. Spiritual discipline turns into spiritual marathon. We are exhausted by Christmas.

It can take a lot of effort to get through this season. Expectations run high. It seems that everywhere you turn there is someone telling us about the best deals, the best presents, the best recipes, the best decorations, the best carols, the best Christmas pageant, the best worship service. The message: we owe our families and our selves the best. Particularly at Christmas. Why? Because we deserve it, we earned it.  Exactly why we deserve it is a little unclear.  Never the less, we chase after the idol of the perfect Christmas.

If you are like me, you can’t step out of the gift buying, decorating, and cooking Christmas culture. At least not without stepping on many toes, not least the toes of your own family. And you don’t want to ignore the spiritual dimensions of Christmas.

What to do?   Besides hide until January?

If you can stand some more holiday advice, may I suggest…

Setting some limits.  For me that means setting limits for myself.  I spend some time thinking seriously about how much shopping, baking, decorating and yes, even spiritually how much I can realistically do.

This season highlights the pull and tug of the secular and the sacred. The pull and tug are always there, but it is much more acute this time of year. The days of Advent remind me of how much trouble I have living holistically. In some ways it is easier segregating the world into sacred and secular spaces. Holding the two together?  Nearly impossible some days.

But yet…. We receive little glimpses, if we have the eyes to see. The small act of kindness in the midst of a crowded mall. The unexpected gift of cookies from a neighbor. A card from a long-lost friend. A moment when you think about your family and are deeply thankful for them. Opportunities to be kind. Opportunities to give to another. To drop a few coins in the kettle. To let someone go ahead of you in line.  Small things. But then again, the kingdom of heaven is found small things and unlikely acts,  a mustard seed, a little yeast, and even a baby.

I’d like to know, what do you think? 

Where do you find your glimpses of heaven?

Community

Community. We talk about it quite a lot, we even long for it, but what is it?

Here is what the Random House Dictionary says:

 1. a social group of any size whose members reside in a specific locality, share government, and often have a common cultural and historical heritage. 

 2. a locality inhabited by such a group. 

 3. a social, religious, occupational, or other group sharing common characteristics or interests and perceived or perceiving itself as distinct in some respect from the larger society within which it exists (usually prec. by the): the business community; the community of scholars. 

4. a group of associated nations sharing common interests or a common heritage: the community of Western Europe. 

 5. Ecclesiastical. a group of men or women leading a common life according to a rule.

6. Ecology. an assemblage of interacting populations occupying a given area. 

7. joint possession, enjoyment, liability, etc.: community of property. 

8. similar character; agreement; identity: community of interests. 

9. the community, the public; society: the needs of the community.

Is there an aspect of community that the dictionary missed?

 I think about community and I wonder. Is community  discovered or made? Do we simply find ourselves part of a community? Or can we actively make or form community? Or is community self creating or self forming. What makes something a community rather than a group or a town or a club? What is distinctive about a community? Do different sorts of community develop in different ways?

I don’t have an answer to these questions. If you do, I’d like to hear it. I have been wondering about  community for a while now.What I do know is that communities are important.

The value of community was brought home to me when we moved five years ago. We left behind several communities: at church, in our neighborhood, at our children’s school, and at our work.  It takes a long time -at least for me- to feel at home in new communities. Finally this year, I am feeling that I am a part of several communities in our new town. 

The communities I feel most at home in and  where I felt most comfortable the most quickly were the communities that required the most of me. Not surprisingly the communities I have given the most to are the most significant communities for me. 

 There does seem to be different kinds of community. Some are more meaningful, more important than others. Even within a particular community, different members may place a different level of value on that community.

Communities are complex. Identity and culture intimately affect communities. All communities arise from culture and all communities shape culture. Communities are shaped by the identities of their members and communities shape the identities of their members.

What is a community? How do communities work? Perhaps this community can help me think about it. This is a topic we will return to from time to time.

I’d like to know what do you think?